005 In Fire

005 of Songs from a Sketchbook is called "In Fire" and you can check it out by clicking here.

I used to avoid writing anything in my music that could be perceived as negative.

I felt like if I had an angry thought or uncomfortable feeling, it was better to process them on my own and then write a song later about being on the other end of that angry thought or uncomfortable feeling.

But lately I've realized...

That's dumb.

I used to really like being perceived as someone who had his shit together. I don't even know if that's actually how anyone perceived me, but I always tried to be that person.

Faaaaaaake.

But now, I'd rather be perceived as the guy who's perfectly comfortable with being in process.

Some of my best processing happens through writing music, so here we are.

I think all of us go through so much privately. More so than anyone realizes. 

What I have loved so much so far about Songs from a Sketchbook is that in choosing to offer up these unpolished pieces of myself, I have had those listening offer the same to me. 

I wasn't prepared for that, and it's the best part.

We're not the only ones feeling uncertain or insecure or hopeless... 

...or angry.

"In Fire" is about anger and it's a song I needed to write because it's a song I've always avoided writing. 

Mostly because it just never felt very nice to write about my frustration with another person. 

However, I've come to form an opinion about honesty recently which is that regardless of how it comes out, it does more for bettering you as a human being than being polite ever could. 

I think you can do both, obviously. There are healthy ways to go about voicing anger. But sometimes when we think of being polite, we go straight to "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all" and suddenly that becomes the priority.

Dumb. 

Not every thought we have is nice. Not everything we feel is nice.

If remaining nice keeps you from being honest, I think that can be potentially harmful to you and to others.

The problem is more so that we have a really hard time handling honesty. It makes us uncomfortable. Which probably goes back to us being taught politeness trumps all. 

So, 005 is about me choosing to honestly express some pretty harsh feelings.

Because in my opinion, if you don't have anything real to say, don't say anything at all.

David